Acheter

ACHETER

(To Buy)

This verb is motherfucking ACHETER and it means TO BUY in it's infinitve form. Do you under-fucking-stand!?

How many times have you bought something? EXACTLY! That's how god damn important this verb is. It's so important I am going to tell you how to remember it (like I will with all the verbs). Before I start I'll say it's expected you have a simple understanding of verb conjugation. Hell if you don't keep reading because it will do no harm to remember everything you will learn from this blog.

Are you a smoker! No? Good. You know how much that costs in ASHTRAYS!! Yeah, I know you see what I did there.

I want you to close your eyes and imagine going to the shop for milk. But you walk in and the wretched smell of stale smoke flies up your nostrils. You try to open your eyes to make your way to the milk but the smoke stings. And you have to feel your way across, but all you can feel is the solid cold outline of a million fucking ASHTRAYS. You bump in to what feels like a person and say, "where can I find the milk?". He knows!

You both make your way through the smog and voila, you're at the fridge. He places it in your hand and you get to the counter to pay. The smoke clears. You place it on the counter only to see it's a god damn ashtray. A heavy ass ashtray. You resign yourself to this and pull out your money only to find it's now a handfull of ashtrays the size of a few pennies. You look at the cashier who is now a human sized ashtray. He says... ashtray.

There's your first bloody lesson.

Out of character note: You really do have to imagine all these things with all your will. The more outrageous and the more they affect the senses the easier they will stay in your head.